It Doesn't Matter Who is Right Or Wrong

I was just reading Matthew chapter 5. It is a great chapter filled with so much. As I read it today I was struck with how we are to respond in arguments, or unjust treatment.

During the early years of our marriage my husband and I would have a big fight about once a year. Other than that, we just don't and didn't fight. But during these arguments, which of course I never started ;) things would be said that were not very kind. Honestly during these times I would just be trying to share my heart or feelings and my husband would get mad and there it would begin. I guess I had pretty bad communication skills. Well after all and more than either of wanted to say was said, I was always the one to apologize and make it better. He NEVER did, not once. For years that bugged me, I mean we should both apologize, we were both in the wrong. But it didn't work that way. Over time I adjusted and my husband has softened some and this isn't really an issue anymore for us. But during those times it was hard for me.

Reading these verses made me realize today that I did right and I would have done better to not even expect an apology.

Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the alter, and there remembr that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift. Matthew 5:23,24

This verse tells me that I am to humble myself and ask forgiveness. It doesn't say anything about the offended brother doing it, I am to do it.

You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. Matthew 5:38, 39

Here this says if I am wronged don't resist. Once again I am to humble myself ask forgiveness and risk getting a strike on my other cheek.

"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. Matthew 5:43,44

Now, I know that my sweet husband has never been my enemy, but you have to admit in the heat of "battle" it can sometimes feel that way. And here it tells me to love him and pray for him. So this would mean to once again apologize, find a way to make it right and pray for his good.

Of course these verses apply to so much more than my marriage, but they do apply. And as I read them this is what came to my mind. There is no need for bitter angry or even hurt thoughts to gain a foothold in my heart when these times happen, because the Lord has already made a way out for me. Humility, forgiveness, love and prayer bring the renewel and sweet peace that I need. And the Lord has shown me the way in His Word.

What a wonderful God we serve!